Up to 23rd February 2006

Still more to do, got a non-saturday coming up so should be able to add some stuff then! Maybe!

MY "BLOG" (soul baring but honest at least!)

The next couple of paragraphs will seem like I'm the most depressed man on earth, I'm not. But I'll write what is bothering me, cos I can work to get it out of my system then!

Rats, I've been feeling a bit down again. There's a lot of miserable people in and outside work at the moment and they have (not discounting myself either!) got me thinking too much about my own problems and getting myself down when I'm alone again - goddamn it, I just want the same as everyone else. To be happy and content etc. Every time I absorb other peoples misery it just reminds me of the things I lack.

Also, feeling that the haircut was a complete waste of time too in terms of my "pulling power". Gonna need a personality change to affect my relationship status and I've been trying for 32 years to do that! There has been no apparent heightened or new interest in me at all from anyone since I had it cut. The only people who have said I look more attractive are people that don't have any interest in me like that whatsoever in any way or are related / male. Grrr.... I'm available, willing, kind, conscientious, funny, witty and free and have been for years so offers on a postcard, well, an email anyway!

Am off out to Newport tomorrow night with a group of people who are all more attractive than me and some, spoken for so have no expectations apart from having a good booze up! At least that should cheer me up!

I know the solution to all this and it's just getting my head around it. My expectations and hopes are too high. I must stop expecting things to happen and either do something, or accept nothing as the only option and forget about things. Once I can do one of those I will finally be a contented man and can get on with my life. 

I'm not as bad as the above paragraphs make it appear, I'm just baring the things that get me down, having a very boring week and I get too much time to wallow then. It is a good release to know that anyone on the planet can read this though and it stops me from boring my friends about it! I still have good friends and the band. My close family is good to me. I will survive!

What's happened over the last week then!

Lauren and Gareth came down on Saturday afternoon after a visit to the cinema. We then went to The Three Blackbirds and met up with Jeff, Dan, Beth and Rachel. After (quite) a few beers we headed to Wetherspoons where we met up with Emma and Chris. Was a good night! Lauren stayed over and on Sunday stayed with me until Dan and Kat picked her up to go home. Cheers all!

Dan and Kat have announced that they are going to have a "commitment ceremony". Kind of like a wedding without the actual marraige bit. Cool! Well done to both of you. They came down on Tuesday and we had a few (yeah right!) beers in the Greenhouse and then I made them some food and they stayed over! Looking forward to whenever the ceremony is guys!

Congratulations! II
Well done to Owain and Tanya who announced that they are expecting their second child. Good on you guys, you fertile pair you!

Off to work shortly - boo! Band practice tonight and booze up tomorrow though! Yay! Laterz..........